In the Valley of Baca Journal #29

From the underside

In the Valley of Baca Journal #29

December 12, 2020: This poem by Corrie Ten Boom, “Life Is But A Weaving,” touched me today  It can be hard to understand the grand picture that God is working of our lives when we can only see the tapestry from the underside— the things we suffer, the troubling times, the sorrows, as long as we are living in this life. When we get to the other side, the “topside of life” in the next world with Jesus, like the topside of the tapestry, then we will understand what God was creating out of our lives as He was working “all things together for good to those who are the called according to His purpose.“(Romans 8:28)

Life Is But A Weaving

Not till the loom is silent and the shuttles cease to fly

Will God unroll the canvas and reveal the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful in the weaver’s skillful hand

As the threads of gold and silver in the pattern He has planned.

He knows, He loves, He cares; nothing this truth can dim.

He gives the very best to those who leave the choice to Him.

Following is a commentary by Lance Wallnau about what is going on in the nation specifically, but I see an application to my own current experience as well:  “…God is working out His plan. We just need to see the grand design through heaven’s eyes. Your life is a thread, tied into the complex and majestic grand design of the story that began in Genesis. God’s Logos, the Word of God, hovered over the chaos of a formless void. The word for this void in Hebrew is the word Tohu va-Volu, which describes a condition of confusion and unfathomable chaos. God hovers over this condition and brings out something beautiful. Looking at the earth we see the void; but looking through heaven’s eyes, we see the design. The Word of God, the Logos, gives us eyes to see what is happening.”

January 31, 2021:  “For David, after he had served the purpose of God in his own generation, fell asleep and was laid with his fathers …” (Acts 13:36)I heard this verse mentioned in a sermon recently and it spoke peace to me—when I have “served the purpose of God” in my own generation, that’s when He will take me Home to be with Him forever.  I feel that His purpose for me through this illness is to be a light for Him–to family, to friends. For over 50 years I have known Him—I experience His forgiveness through His blood, I have seen many answered prayers, and I’ve tasted what it is like to sense the sweetness and beauty of His Presence. He is the Beautiful One. And life forever with Him can only be beautiful.

In the Valley of Baca Journal #24

In the Valley of Baca Journal #24

Nov. 25, 2019: “To every thing there is a season…a time to be born and a time to die…He has made everything beautiful in its time…

(Eccl.3:2,11)

My recent health issues have caused me to think a lot about life and death. Just as a time to be born comes to each of us—when we emerge from the womb and metaphorically a “mist,” before we can remember anything—just so there comes to each of us a “time to die.”  How we live our lives between those two times is critical for what comes next—how we respond to the Savior when He calls to us to come to Him and yield up our lives to Him.

But when the time comes to die—does the statement of verse 11 apply? “He has made everything beautiful in its time…”? Does this apply to “a time to die”? I want to think that that is a promise I can cling to.

 December 30, 2019: “The rough-looking diamond is put upon the wheel of the gem-smith. He cuts it on all sides. It loses much–much that seemed costly to itself. The king is crowned; the diadem is put upon the monarch’s head accompanied by the trumpet’s joyful sound. A glittering ray flashes from that coronet, and it beams from that same diamond that was so recently fashioned at the wheel.

You may venture to compare yourself to such a diamond, for you are one of God’s people; and this is the time of the cutting process. Let faith and patience have their perfect work, for in the day when the crown is set upon the head of the King, eternal, immortal, invisible, one ray of glory shall stream from you. “They shall be mine, says the LORD of Hosts, in the day when I make up my treasured possession.”² “Better is the end of a thing than its beginning.’ “

~Alistair Begg

I saw this embroidered verse at the chemo treatment center where I go to receive my treatments. I would only add to one of the phases—“It cannot steal the peace that Jesus gives.”

I’m treasuring the time that I have left. Only God knows how long. In the meantime, I’m thinking about how much there is to do and how I’m hoping to be able to do it—unfinished projects; prayers for my family and friends; so much of life yet to live.

When people hear that I am undergoing chemotherapy for cancer, I see pity in their eyes—chemo is rough, but so much better than it used to be. I feel thankful for it, for it is buying me precious time with my family, and especially the grandchildren whom I adore, and for whom I pray.

Physically I am doing okay, though feeling the effects of the medicine that is saving my life. I have been able to make the trip to Florida for a time this month, and hope to do the same through April, coming home for treatments every 4 weeks .

Life is good. God is good! I’m thankful!

In the Valley of Baca Journal #23

August 22, 2019: “Your eyes shall see the King in His beauty…” (Isaiah 33:17) I feel this promise is about the life that is to come. It gives me hope.

September 3, 2019: “I shall not die but live, and shall declare the works and recount the illustrious acts of the Lord.” (Psalm 118:17)            I was mildly amused recently listening to a Gospel song called “Everybody Wants To Go To Heaven, But Nobody Wants To Die.”  That is a true statement. 

September 14, 2019: I awoke this morning with this verse in mind: “Every day will I bless Thee—I will praise Your Name forever and ever.” (Psalm 145:2)  Forever and ever goes well beyond this life. I feel like I am being reminded more and more about the next life that awaits me—that although this present life will end, life itself does not end here.

“You, Lord, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.” (Psalm 118:28)

October 9, 2019: “God uses suffering and impending death to unfasten us from this earth and to set our minds on what lies beyond.” (Randy Alcorn in Heaven)  This is so true. I’m feeling unfastened. And I’ve changed the way I’m thinking about the end of this life—instead of thinking about “when I die…” I’m framing it a “when the Lord calls me Home.” That perspective changes my outlook from a feeling of sadness to an expectation of hope and excitement for what waits beyond.

October 20, 2019:

“Courage! 
For Life is hastening

To endless Life away.

The inner fire unwasting

Transfigures our dull clay.

See the stars melting, sinking

In Lifewine golden, bright.

We of the splendor drinking

Shall grow to stars of light

~George MacDonald

So the other shoe has dropped—my latest CT scan has shown that the cancer has once more reared its ugly head and returned. I will need to have another round of chemo immediately. There has been some pain over the last couple months, so the chemo may actually bring some welcome relief. Emotionally, it has been a another hard hit for me, for my family and friends to have to work through the implications of all this once more—not as hard as the first time, but we are still in the Valley of Weeping, of Baca. And yet the peace of God, which passes understanding, is keeping and guarding my heart.

None of us has more than the present moment—we’re not even guaranteed the next breath, although we live as if life here on earth will just go on as it always has before. I have been made very aware of my own mortality and it is something that I think about every day. But I think about it with thankfulness that the Lord has made Himself known to me; and that the promises that are in the scriptures about the life to come are real for those who believe in Him—and will become real for  me at some point. For now, I will live to give thanks for every day—and night, for the scriptures say that “For He gives blessings to His beloved even in his sleep.” (Psalm 127:2) –days and nights, maybe even years, that I have left to live here on earth with my beloved family and friends.

In The Valley of Baca Journal #16

October 30, 2018: For some reason I don’t understand entirely, until the wee hours of this morning, I hadn’t been able to ask the Lord to heal me.  But in the dark and quiet of this morning, the prayer bubbled up from deep inside, “O Jesus, please heal me—heal me please!”  All through this day the prayer kept repeating, quietly, urgently—“Please—heal me!”

October 31, 2018: I learned today the results of some genetic testing I had done that I have a “broken gene” and that it may lie at cause of this cancer.

November 9, 2018: I had a surgical repair done 3 days ago of a suture line from my previous surgery—a “wound dehiscence” they called it. I have been feeling quite well ever since and am thankful to God for that.

November 11, 2018: This verse speaks to me today—He will quiet you with His love…” (Zephaniah 3:17) My inner spirit has felt so peaceful and hopeful all the way through this ordeal (once the initial shock had passed)—it has to be from the Lord. I feel confident that I am in the center of His will as I pass through this Valley of Baca.

November 13,2018: “Surely God is my salvation, I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation.” (Isaiah 12:2)

November 14,2018: As I am passing through this Valley of Weeping, and making it a “place of springs—of pools of blessings,” I am thinking about how the depth of my trust in the Lord has increased—how my hope in Him has grown—not only for this life, but to think beyond this life—to consider with more seriousness than ever, my hope for the next phase of life—beyond the grave. These are some of the “pools of blessing” in the Valley.

Another pool of blessing has been experiencing the love of so many friends, and of my family, as they have reached out to me and prayed for me.

November 15,2018: “Your God has commanded your strength; O God, display Your might and strengthen what You have wrought for us!” (Ps. 68:28)

Many friends have complimented me on my “strength” as I am going through this trial, but I know that it is God Who has strengthened me, and strengthened my faith, for on my own I would surely have succumbed to fear and sadness and hopelessness.  I am totally dependent on Him for the strength to face this cancer and for the faith He is building in my heart.

“And as your days are, so will your strength, your rest and security be.” ~Deut. 33:25

November 17,2018: “How great You are, O Sovereign Lord! There is no one like You and there is no God but You!”  ~2 Samuel 7:22

The sky was clear this morning while still dark just before dawn, and I stepped outside briefly to look at the stars—they always take my thoughts right to God—how amazing He is that He could create this immense and immeasurably vast and complex universe by speaking it into existence!  I am ever in awe!

And then to think—that He loves me! That He came to earth as a man to give His own human life to pay the ransom for me—for anyone who will believe—so that we can be with Him forever!

“The Lord will be your everlasting Light and your God will be your glory.  ~Isaiah 60:19

Beyond the Wall

 

 

 

 

Imagine a great wall.  On one side of the wall is the natural world that we see and experience with our senses, the culture and the world we live in. On this natural side of the wall, people are milling around, studying the wall, speculating about the mystery of what lies beyond the wall or even if anything lies beyond. Yet on the other side of the wall lies the spiritual, a world quite invisible to the natural eye.

Francis Schaeffer said of these two worlds: “There are two parts to reality; the natural world—that which we see, normally; and the supernatural part. … The supernatural is really no more unusual in the universe, from the biblical viewpoint, than what we normally call the natural. The only reason we call it the supernatural part is that usually we cannot see it.” (True Spirituality)

In the midst of the wall stands a door with one word engraved on it, an invitation: “Come…”

On the natural side of the wall, much has been written about the door and what lies beyond the wall. The writings are ancient and are regarded differently—some take the view that the writings are out dated and too old to be truly significant. They study the writings, but for them it is more like an autopsy—taking apart the words, dissecting, trying to decide what parts to accept as meaningful, which parts to reject.  Others speculate the words to be special and holy, inspired by God, Himself.

 

From the natural side of the wall, the door looks plain, uninteresting—restrictive, lacking the sparkling fun and enjoyment they desire. But the people are restless, sensing emptiness in their lives; few, however, approach the door to open it and find out what lies beyond.

“The Christian life looks boring and constricted to outsiders.  But open the door and it ushers into room after room of delights.” ~Andre Seu

If perchance one does approach the door, press gently to open it and step through, suddenly a panorama previously unseen appears: A new understanding of life dawns, of who God is and of those ancient words the masses were speculating about… an immense universe opens before this one’s eyes.

“Oh glory of the lighted mind!

How dead I’ve been, how dumb, how blind.

The station brook to my new eyes,

Was babbling out of Paradise,

The waters rushing from the rain

Were singing, ‘Christ has risen again.’

I thought all earthly creatures knelt

From rapture of the joy I felt.”

~”The  Everlasting Mercy” by Masefield

The light is bright, the sights are beautiful—so much beauty, so much peace, so much meaning! No matter how far the person ventures, whether just inside the door, or farther up and farther in, always there is more, more to discover!

A “sine qua non” exists however (sine qua non is a Latin phrase meaning, “without which not”—it is the absolutely essential part.)  The wall is constructed of our unbelief and sin. Millions linger there outside, and tragically for them, they never approach the door—the Door which is a Person—Jesus Christ, Who said of Himself, “I Myself am the Door…” (John 10:7)

He, Himself, is the sine qua non—the “without which not”—the absolutely essential factor to gaining entrance to the spiritual universe on the other side of the wall.

And faith in Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord, and His sacrificial death for all mankind is the “sine qua non” that allows one to step through the Door and see with the understanding. For scripture states, “Without faith it is impossible to please and be satisfactory to Him.  For whoever would come near to God must [necessarily] believe that God exists and that He is the rewarder of those who earnestly and diligently see Him out.”

Remember the word engraved on the Door is “Come…”—an invitation to each one in the troubled natural world to enter a realm of peace with God, of understanding life and death, a world of hope and eternal Life.

The invitation is for all time, to all people. Leave behind the filth, the evil which clings to you, the impure thoughts and actions. Turn away from all that and accept His terms and commit yourself to living by His Lordship. The invitation is to you. So, come—step through the Door and find true Life! Come! Come! Come!

“Because eternity was closeted in time, He is our open Door to forever.”

~Luci Shaw

The Choice

 

 

How many stars are there in the Milky Way? Estimates are, in our galaxy alone, approximately one hundred million! One hundred million is also the number of neurons, or nerve cells, in the brain of a newborn baby. In addition, approximately one trillion glial cells (from the Greek word for “glue”) nourish and protect the neurons with a honeycomb-like formation.

If we could listen in on the electrical activity of these developing brain cells as, during the 9 months in the womb, they are laying out the circuits for vision, language, and all the future activities of the baby’s brain, we would hear an amazing cacophony of “rat-a-tat-tats.” Not a random static like that heard on a untuned radio, but staccato bursts of electricity stimulated by coordinated waves of neural activity.

Cells in one neighborhood of the brain communicating with cells in other areas of the brain, laying down the electrical grid work for future use in life outside the womb. This activity is purposeful and deliberate, beginning as early as 10-12 weeks in the pre-born child.*

But what is it again that women are told in abortion counseling about their 10-12 week old fetus**? “Why, it is nothing more than a piece of tissue—kind of like your fingernail!” For over 40 years lies such as this have been told to vulnerable, troubled women to promote the practice of legal abortion in America.

Masquerading as compassion for women, a $500 million per year abortion industry thrives on this deceit. Most of the over 50 million American abortions since 1973 have been performed on 10-12 week old fetuses, although an unknown number are now done chemically with the abortion pill RU486, used to abort pregnancies of less than 8 weeks.

But an appalling number of abortions are also executed on older unborn babies (up to full-term) by the torturous methods of saline poisoning and partial-birth abortion.

In the early years of legal abortion, the argument was made that since it was unknown when life began, terminating an early pregnancy wouldn’t matter. However, with modern technology we now know that life clearly begins at the moment of conception.

Unfortunately it no longer seems to matter, for something has happened to our respect for human life. At what point did it become acceptable to end the life of the innocent and helpless unborn? Was it in 1973 with the Roe v. Wade Supreme Court decision that the unborn babies are not really persons?

More likely it crept unawares into our thinking long before that. For at the root of this loss of respect lies the assumption of atheistic evolution that there is no God and that life just somehow made itself. Therefore, it stands to reason that we can make our own rules about life and death issues.

This teaching, which has infiltrated our education system and claims to be the scientific truth, asserts that all creatures, including humans, are merely animals—no more, no less—accidents of time and space. The life of an unborn child, since it is then considered no different than a chicken embryo, is expendable for it has no intrinsic value.

This worldview, seeds of which were sown long ago, has turned our culture into one that accepts death as a solution for some of society’s difficult problems, such as the expense of caring for the sick, the elderly, and children born out of wedlock.

Think of the decisions now being considered by law makers:

• Should the barbarous practice of partial-birth abortion on viable fetuses, already allowed in some states, be banned or allowed?

• Should doctors be empowered to euthanize the sick and elderly?

• Should born-alive abortion babies be saved or thrown out with the rubbish?

• Should we experiment on human embryos for stem-cell research, sacrificing one life to help another?

• Should human embryos be grown, or cloned, then harvested for body parts?

• Should human DNA be intermingled with that of animals?

But taking a closer look at the miracle of an unborn child’s developing brain, we see evidence of what the Bible proclaims—that we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” (Psalm 139:13-16).

Stop and consider Psalm 100:3: “It is He Who has made us, and not we ourselves.” Each human being is, in the eyes of God, a valuable treasure worth the sacrifice that Jesus Christ made of His Own life—for any person who will believe in Him.

This same God, Who with infinite power created the uncountable number of stars, has planted within the hearts of men, women, children and yes, even the unborn, the gift of His own divine image. And with that gift comes a breath-taking responsibility: “I have set before you life and death…, says the Lord, therefore, choose life!” (Deuteronomy 30:19)

Choosing life means deciding to honor and obey God  and the rules He has given us to guide and protect us from evil. To choose death means to disregard, disrespect and disobey what He has said-and suffer the consequences. When we embrace the theories of atheistic evolution as truth, which is it that we are really choosing—life or death?

Which is it that you are choosing?

*J. Madeleine Nash, “Fertile Minds,” Time, February 3, 1997
**”Fetus” is the Latin word for “little one.”